I find myself often, as a single young woman, going through seasons or times or moments of feeling very discouraged and lonely and discontent and sometimes I feel my depressing creeping in.
It’s an every day thing- I go on social media, and I see a new friend of mine is engaged. Or someone is having a baby. Or they have a new boyfriend or girlfriend. All of my close friends who I grew up with are having these incredible experiences, and I’m so beyond happy for them, but I can’t help but stop and ask; “Lord, when is it going to be my turn?”
Perhaps you live in a very small town, or you go to a small church like I do, and you don’t know of any guys who aren’t in a relationship or who would be a good fit for you. I understand. Every guy at my church is married or engaged, or too young for me.
I have had one boyfriend. I was eight years old. I have never had a relationship that truly meant something.
I fell in love two years ago, and I watched as the guy I adored moved from girl to girl. He dated my cousin, one of my best friends, and that destroyed my heart for a long time. Now, he has a son and he’s getting married.
I’ll be honest. I lost faith and my hope disappeared when I found out he was going to have a child. I had this fantasy- I was going to marry my first love, and we would be happy together forever. When I found out that would never happen; I believed I would be single for my whole life. I was crushed.
I have recently found something that can take away my discomfort, and loneliness, and can make me feel peaceful and joyful and so satisfied with my life.
I think of the beautiful stories that I was told as a child. How our God created the Earth and everything upon it. How he parted the red sea. How he helped David defeat Goliath. How he saved us all from spending an eternity in Hell. If he can do such incredible things, such impossible things, he can bring me a life partner.
When the time is right, God is going to give me a husband. He is so large. He is so good. I will have faith, I will put all of my trust in him, and I will wait. And I will be joyful as I wait.